Lying is something I've always preached about and always requested that people tell me the truth, no matter how bad they think it is or how upset they think I might get. So what if I get mad, I'll get over it and I'll respect you more for having the balls to tell me the truth! With that, I just gotta say, I have never in my whole life experienced or been lied to so much as I have in the past seven years... and because of my profession, it's just gonna continue. But the seven years I'm referring to is my personal life and a certain individual... ups and downs as any normal "relationship" would have (ANY kind of relationship) but this past year has just been a bugger of lies and deceipt! I knew when it started, I knew it was getting worse and I knew before it blew up that it was about to blow up... and that's ok. It's not ok how it all went down because it could have been avoided if there had been truth... not necessarily the parting of ways, but the blow up and the way the parting took place.
I've been attending a program at church called Celebrate Recovery... its similar to AA in that there's a recovery principle/process but it's a Christ based program focusing on hurts, habits and hang ups. It's a really good program and every week I attend I walk away with new insight to my life and how to "deal" with the things (be it old or new) affecting me. Last night's class was no exception... it was probably one of the classes that spoke to me most. There were so many verses and attributes that fit perfectly in what my life is managing right now... and how lies and deceipt are the work of the Devil (which I knew but it's always good to have a reminder). NO GOOD CAN EVER COME FROM LYING!!!!
The mind of a sinful man is death, but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace; the sinful mind is hostile to God. It does not submit to God's law, nor can it do so. Those controlled by the sinful nature cannot please God... Romans 8:6-8
A greedy man brings trouble to his family... Proverbs 15:27
In my walk I've struggled with "knowing" when God is talking to me or showing me a true sign, "how will I know" and will I be strong enough to relenquish control and actually listen to him? I learned last night that, you just know, and yes I am strong enough to hand it all to Him... I've been telling Him for months now that it's out of my control and that I was handing it to Him but still had that struggle of knowing.
On my way to work Monday I was blessed with a beautiful sight... A Bald Eagle flew overhead right in front of me! There I was driving along and the most beautiful bird ever flew across the road right above me as I passed under him. A warmth came over me, a feeling of pride and freedom... I don't know how else to explain it, it was just a feeling of renewal and hope. I thanked God for his awesome and wonderous works of nature and for allowing me to enjoy in its beauty. Then last night in class the teacher played a song for us called Voice of Truth, in his video of the song (not the one below) as the song was playing a picture of an Eagle soaring popped up... I seriously almost lost it and was glad to be sitting in the back so nobody could see me. He spoke to me, I heard him and I'm listening...
If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever... 1 Timothy 5:8
